Our weekend: The Wilderness

When Mike and I first received the diagnosis that he had cancer we needed some direction or a word from God to hang on to  We were doing some devotions together from the bible, and Mike was in the middle of reading Exodus. We decided to read the chapter that he was at in his reading plan. Exodus 14 is the chapter where the Isreaelites are terrified because they have been led out of Egypt and have been wandering in the desert. In chapter 14 they find themselves being persued by the Egyptian army, they are trapped, they fear death and they question God.. The story goes on to describe one of God's most amazing miracles: the parting of the red sea and the deliverance of the Israelites.

This is one of those childhood bible stories that I've almost become immune to over the years. However on the day I found out that God was leading us into the uncharted territory of Cancer, I felt like God was leading our family into the wilderness. He spoke these words directly to my heart and I have had to revisit this promise again and again as we navigate our way through the wilderness.  

"Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still." Exodus 14:13

This past weekend was our "recovery" weekend from the chemo, but I think Mike and I would describe our weekend more as the wilderness than a rest from chemo. The side effects hit Mike very hard. He was struggling with nausea, vomiting and fatigue to a greater intensity than before. He was very uncomfortable and unable to participate in any normal family activities. It is so hard to watch your loved one suffer. It is hard to meet the needs of the kids when they are missing the presence of their daddy. To make the weekend even more challenging Tyler and Keegan both had runny noses and coughs. The workload was intense, the nights very long.

I had to go back to that chapter in Exodus to remind myself that even when God leads you into the wilderness, He has a great plan, and He will be glorified through it.  On Sunday Mike and I were both feeling very weak. I went to church with the boys and I received words of encouragement, prayer, gifts and hugs from our church family.  I stepped back and watched how God is taking great care of Real Life in our absence and  I was assured that he will take great care of my sick husband.

We came home and Toby and I went and snuggled with Mike in bed while the little boys napped. I asked Toby what story he heard in Kids church and he said they read a story about a man who was sick and God healed him. Mike and I both had a few tears and Toby asked us why our faces were leaking. We had good laugh.

The boys and I then went outside and hung out with some of our awesome neighbors and family and the boys had a blast playing street hockey. I soaked up some sun and just felt very peaceful in the midst of it all.

That evening I managed to track down the oncologist and get Mike some different medication for his nausea. Within and hour he was feeling relief and even a bit hungry. God is taking care of us and I know he has good reason for leading us into the wilderness.